Friday, April 5, 2019

My Brother's Picture on the Wall ... Part II

A few months ago I wrote about how I fulfilled a deathbed promise to my father to find my half-brother (and his long-lost son) Tommy.  Here is how it all turned out ...

During my last conversation with my father, Lloyd (Brad) Bradford, Sr., I promised him that I would keep looking for Tommy, his oldest son and my half-brother, long-lost due to a difficult divorce between Pappy and his first wife.  Pappy passed away only a few hours after I made that promise to him. Here is what I was thinking when I finally found Tom:
We did it, Pappy ... we finally found Tommy!  But, just like the car-chasing dog who finally caught one I have to ask myself, "now what do I do with it?"  I couldn't help but have the fear that he did not want to be found ... and vowed that if that were the case, I at least could know he was alive and had what appeared to be a good life.
Over the past few months, Tom and I had several email conversations.  We exchanged pictures, asked each other a bunch of questions, and started the process of getting to know each other after all these years. I couldn't be more wrong about my fear ... he truly appreciated being "found!"  This winter, during Mindy and my "snowbird" extended vacation in Florida, my mother suggested a trip to Kentucky to visit with my Uncle John and Aunt Shirley, who are my Pappy's younger brother and his wife.  Since they live just a few minutes away from brother Tom and his wife, Brenda, we thought this would be a wonderful opportunity to visit with them and meet up face-to-face.

I sent a message to Tom a week or so before our trip.  He and Brenda invited us to join them for Sunday Brunch at the Greyhound Tavern, a "taste of true Kentucky hospitality" located in Ft. Mitchell, near the family homeland.  They also invited us to join them at their house in Burlington, KY, after brunch for an afternoon visit.  After a wonderful meal (loaded with great conversation and down-home flavor) we followed Tom and Brenda to their home.

As our conversation continued, we talked about the picture that my parents had hanging on our wall while I was growing up.  I described it to Tom, and he excused himself and went into the other room.  when he returned, he had a portrait in his hand.  "Is this it?" he asked.

Immediately my mind was taken back to the youngest days of my youth.  I was looking at the exact picture of Tommy, my big brother that graced our living room wall so many years ago.  In the lower right-hand side of the image was the name of the studio that produced the portriat, "Rembrandt" ... a detail that I had long since forgotten but immediately recognized.  Yes, my brother, this is how I remembered you after all these years.

"This was taken at my first Holy Communion," he said.  "I was maybe seven or eight years old then."

I looked again at that picture from long ago.  I immediately recognized the look on his face ... his eyes ... I saw myself in my older brother ... I saw our father.  After that, it was hard to see through the tears in my eyes that I tried bravely to hide from everyone else.

So, where are we after all these years?  I am 62 as of this writing ... Tom is 74 ...

Here is our first-ever picture together, along with Uncle John Bradford ...

Ok ... I might be taller ... and I'm damned sure fatter!  (I take after Grandpa Russell Bradford.)  Tom, in the middle, is grinning from ear to ear ... and Uncle John with his cane is taking his rightful place as Family Patriarch ... Uncle John holds the record as oldest-living male member of our family ... outliving my Pappy and Great-Great-Great Grandfather Ambrose Bradford (2nd and 3rd place respectively.)  May all three of us (and our collective sons) beat this longevity record!

I'm hoping that all of us, our sons, and grandsons can get together again someday for a real "family reunion" ...

During our visit, Tom shared his "man-cave" with me.  Brenda and Mindy got to know each other as sisters-in-law (and really hit it off) ... Uncle John and Aunt Shirley discovered that a neighbor of theirs was Tom's Aunt Wanda, his mother's sister!  All these years ... all of us so close ... and yet, so far apart!  We enjoyed Tom's potato and leek soup, along with sandwiches and Brenda's outstanding hospitality.  At the end of the day, we realized how much we had grown to love these fine people after just a few hours of getting to know each other.  We exchanged hugs, kisses, and expressions of true love.  We departed with a promise to get together again soon!

I love you, my brother!  I can't wait until the next time we see each other!


2 comments:

  1. What a wonderful connection. I am happy that the two of you got to meet.

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  2. Reading this with tears in my eyes. How awesome for all of you. Louise C.

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